Yes, that’s the subject to an email I just sent in response to a placement vacancy at Love Creative. I don’t know if I should be finding myself hilarious, or throwing up with embarrassment. There’s a reason for the MIB references, and I’ll get straight on with it.
Do you want to be the Willard Smith of the advertising and design world?
Are you a recent creative graduate? Do you want to use your creative skills to solve business problems for brands like Johnnie Walker, PlayStation and Nike? If I offered you a two month paid placement with us at our Manchester studio, how much of my hand would you bite off?
If your answer is beyond my elbow, please send the following to firstname.lastname@example.org:
1. A short introduction explaining who you are, where you come from, what your favourite Willard Smith film is, and why.
2. A PDF portfolio that showcases big ideas, thoughtful strategy, craft skills, personal work, and evidence of a curious mind. (If it helps any, we’re not particularly interested in typefaces made out of twigs, letterhead and business card design, tea-making abilities, or flyers for your dad’s Depeche Mode tribute band.)
Unfortunately we won’t be able to reply to everyone. But if your work demonstrates that you’re the kind of creative that would flourish here – whether you’re a writer, designer, art director, developer, maker of things, competitive eating champion, or all of the above – we’ll be in touch.
There you have it. What an advertisement! Definitely something different, with a tone of voice I immediately fell in love with.
Basically, I didn’t want to send off any old job application. I wanted to stand out. I needed to stand out. I needed to be a little different.
That’s when it hit me! I’ve been mulling over the idea of lonely hearts columns in my head for a while now. I wanted to record some kind of viral video, akin to those amazing 80s dating montages available on Youtube, but I never had the time. Why not use the idea now? Why not send in an application in the style of a shitty, but incredibly self aware, lonely hearts ad?
I’m a 24 year old copywriter who graduated in 2009. I’m 5″10, and the wrong side of 13 stone. I have brown hair, brown eyes, and a hint of ginger in my rather substantial beard.
I like long walks on the beach, freshly cut grass, picnics, puppies, and I must say, I’m ever so fond of a good cliché. If I had to choose, my favourite Will Smith film would be Men In Black, as it still stands up as one of the most witty and entertaining Blockbusters released through out my childhood.
I, like everyone in life, is looking for that special someone. A person who will take me under their wing, shielding me from the harshness of the outside world, and spend their hours guiding me in the best possible direction to make sure I blossom into a wonderful and proud copywriter.
Could you be my Man/Woman in Black? If so, look to Orion’s Belt and you’ll know where to find me.
Again, I don’t know if I should be jumping for joy, or jumping off the balcony. I suppose only time will tell! I had nothing to lose, and everything to gain.
If I make someone laugh, smirk, or even crack the tiniest of smiles, at least that’s already put me at an advantage over a boring “I do this, I did this, hire me please” kind of response I imagine a few people will send in. However, with it being Love Creative, I imagine there are some absolute geniuses applying for the role, but even a “Well done, but not you” email will give me a pretty good sense of achievement. If I hear nothing back? I’ll never do anything this stupid again.
Well, until the next email I send which will begin “In West Cardiff central born and raised, on my personal computer is where I spent most of my days. Chilling out, maxing, relaxing all cool, shooting some n00bs on the Unreal Tournament map pool”
Someone. Please. Stop me.