Category Archives: Badvertising

When Cutdowns Go Wrong.

Let me prefix this entry with a disclaimer. I honestly didn’t plan to start writing about advertising again with a negative post. I wanted to start with fireworks, song and dance, and a love letter written to the industry I longed and am proud to work in, but unfortunately, the first set of ads that actively made my fingers itch just happened to rub me up the wrong way. Sorry about that. I’m pretty sure any one that knows me will be able to tell you it was inevitable really… I’m a bit of an arse.

Let me set the scene for you. It was Sunday evening. I’d just eaten a bowl of soup, I had a fever, I felt like my sinuses have been hit with bricks, and the Pride And Prejudice series featuring Colin Firth just happened to be on the TV. I’ll admit now that I was half watching it through a haze of over the counter pain-killers and a game of Monopoly on my iPhone, but I most definitely paid attention during the ad breaks… if only to annoy Victoria by telling her if I liked them or not.

The ads that caught my eye were actually the sponsorship idents for the programme I was so desperately trying to not become hooked on. They were 10 second stings for Warner Leisure Hotels made by the Aesop Agency and you can watch three of them below.

The first thing that hit me after viewing each ident was a feeling of confusion. What exactly was going on in each one? We peer into the lives of an elderly couple going about their rather mundane lives and then skip to shots of the couple doing something vaguely similar in the grounds of a Warner Leisure Hotel. My first thought when seeing the idents was, ‘why, exactly?’. The two different sets of moments seem rather unparalleled on a first watch. If you take the second ident, where Carol tells Colin they’re seeing her sister three times in the coming week, he looks upset to say the least. We then jump to a hotel where we see them shaking hands with others at a dinner table. Are we being told that through the pleasure of a stay in a Warner Hotel we can live more memorable moments that we would in our normal lives? Are these moments in the hotel supposed to be an escape from the mundane? The banality of ‘real life’? Surely it would have been more effective if after we saw Colin being told he was seeing his sister in law three times in a week, it was him alone enjoying the pleasures of a hotel break. At least then there’s a sense of ‘I can enjoy a more exciting and fulfilling time in a WLH than I can in real life’.

The same can be said for any of the idents. If we were to see the couple sacking off their normal lives to flirt with the pleasures only available in a Warner Leisure Hotel, it would at least have the ‘go from A to B’ effect and a simple take away of ‘my life has been improved with this product’. That at least, was my first guess, but on repeat watching, the couple we see in the hotel are actually completely different. The plot thickened.

After at least ten seconds spent rummaging through a google search listing, I stumbled upon the full 40 second ads in the series. They completely changed my perspective of the idents, but they left me feeling exactly the same about the cutdowns. I still didn’t like them.

After viewing the above, we now know that Colin and Carol are neighbours to the unnamed Warner Leisure Hotel couple. It’s like an alternate version of Keeping Up With The Joneses… you know, where you don’t even try to keep up with the, you just sort of, live with what you’ve got.

In the 40 second ads we find out that Colin is dealing with the boredom of being married to an unadventurous woman who refuses to try new things. I almost felt sorry for the poor sod. The second of those 40 second spots above is actually incredibly enjoyable to watch. I’m not going to pretend that I didn’t chuckle as he walked into the pool wearing golfing attire, only to pop out the other side with his trunks on. It was nice. It told a story. The ad sold me a lifestlye. After watching those 40 second ads, I know that to try new things as an over 50 couple, I should be packing up and heading off to a Warner Hotel. It was something the idents failed to do.

Maybe I had to have seen the full suite of ads before seeing the idents, but after re-watching the cutdowns I’m still left with a sour taste in my mouth. Why is half the time in a ten second ad showing me something boring? Why isn’t every valuable second showing me exactly how to make my own memorable moments in a WLH? It’s a question that still confuses me. If ‘Life Begins At Warner’, why am I being show a couple who don’t want their life to begin… Well, at least half of a couple who don’t want their lives to begin anyway.

Could it be a case of trying to fit established creative into the 10 second cutdowns, or could it just be a case of misunderstanding… Maybe I just don’t get it. To me, it just seems like a waste. With such a nice 40 second ad in ‘Colin And The Dragon’ and the obvious benefits in staying at a WLH (golf courses, archery and showtunes!), why waste so much valuable ad time showing me people who don’t want to embrace a fun weekend away. Again, why show me a couple who don’t want their exciting new lives to start at Warner? There’s no benefit to that. In my eyes, the cutdowns just don’t do the job they’re supposed to. They don’t do enough to sell me the ‘memorable moments’ promised by Warner Leisure Hotels… The cutdowns just went a bit wrong.

If you’ve got any thoughts on the ads I’d love to hear your opinions. After all, I’m merely one person, completely out of the target audience, trying not to watch Pride And Prejudice on a Sunday evening, getting completely confused by ten second idents that aren’t even aimed at me. It’s a tough life.

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Split Screen Is The New Nostalgia: Part Two

I never understood the draw to Blackberry. I especially don’t understand the draw to Blackberry now, when everyone and their Mother has an iPhone, or an Android capable phone. It was just one of those things/fads/wants that passed me by. How fitting of me to try and wade in on the most recent Blackberry ad as they attempt to sell me their way of life, their mantra, and of course, their new handset.

Here’s what Blackberry had to say;

We believe life’s made up of two kinds of people. Those content to go with the flow, and those who grab life with both hands. If you are someone who seizes opportunities, asks the questions, makes things happen, BlackBerry is designed for you.

Thanks for the life affirming choice defined by a telephone Mr.Blackberry. I better get a handset so people know I’m the ‘get up and go’ kind of cat that doesn’t follow anybody’s rules, not even his own! Facetiousness aside, the advert is okay I guess. It sells itself on the idea that a person is defined by what phone they have. In fact, I can remember a time when you were defined by what phone you had (does this still happen?). If it was anything other than a Nokia 3210 you were the scum of the earth…

That reminds me of a little story.

I’ve only ever been mugged once in my life, but there could have been a second time. I was surrounded by a group of at least 5 late teens when I was about 14 years old in the centre of Manchester. I was told to give them my phone. I of course obliged, because it’s only a phone, and I quite like my face the shape that it is. On pulling a blue brick with detachable antenna from my pocket, I was immediately laughed at, and told to be on my way, phone in hand. That’s right, when I was 14, even muggers didn’t want my phone.

Distractions aside, the advert does it’s job. It sells the kind of lifestyle Blackberry want their phone owners to have. They’re attracting the strong thinking individuals clamouring to get away from the large market reach of Apple. Has it been successful? Time will tell. How do I feel about the advert? Well I’m glad you asked…

First thing’s first; the soundtrack is god awful. In the ad we’re trying to associate with the images on the right, or at least we’re supposed to if we fit in with the Blackberry way of life. So why on earth is the soundtrack so wishy-washy? So boring?! It’s lift music. It’s exactly what the viewer is not supposed to be; indecisive! It’s the entire opposite of the campaign idea.

Text is kept to a minimum throughout, so very much like the Gu advert ‘Give In’, we’re left with imagery, and our own imagination. That’s usually a nice experience, but here the choice of imagery is a tad strange. None of it really screams ‘individual’. The choices could have had a little more thought put into them, as some are a bit lacking. Fillers if you will.

However, there are a few hidden gems in there. The “can’t be bothered” vs the “can’t wait” is at least a second baser, but hidden in the last fifteen seconds of so is an absolute home-run. One of life’s great questions. If you didn’t see it, take a look.



That, is fucking genius, and I’ll applaud the creative until the cows come home for that one. It’s perfect. It’s witty, clever, and questioning, all in two seconds of moving image. In fact, sack the entire advert off, run this as a billboard campaign, use the line “We believe life’s made up of two kinds of people. Those content to go with the flow, and those who grab life with both hands” (or the line from the ad, whatever), and the tagline “Which one are you”? Heck, I’d buy a Blackberry right now if that existed.

I don’t like ending a post on a high note, so we’ll go for the shit sandwich approach. Music; rubbish. Imagery of glass; genius. The line “Do You?”; hate it. I don’t really know why either. It just doesn’t sit right. Maybe I’ve got some sort of vendetta against the written word at the moment, because I hated the line from the Suzuki advert too. Who knows.

Anyway, I’m off to stare at a glass of water in the hope it’ll magically turn into a Blackberry. That, or I’m just going to drink it.

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We’ve Been Go Compare’d

A couple of days ago I posted an image of a defaced Go Compare advert. I looked, I laughed, I posted, I moved on. The world was a great place to live in, that was until my lunch time when I saw this on facebook.

Now, that’s a very similar style of graffiti to the one I posted the other day. A serial attacker maybe? Who knows.

Well, guess what. I do. It’s been playing on my mind all day, so I went on a little research spree. Now without seeing that second image I would have lived my life merry in the notion that only I (and you) had seen the aforementioned graffiti, but two similar occurrences? Impossible. It seems there have been a few other “vandalism” attempts on subsequent Go Compare billboards.

This is all starting to seem like a bit of a consipiracy to me.

Well I guess it’s no surprise that the images I’ve posted are part of a broader campaign to, get this, bring even more attention to the launch of the new Go Compare advert. Mainly by abusing the fact that they have the most annoying character on television and most hated advert two years in a row by running a campaign making fun of their own star, all the while encouraging the smartphone obsessed public to eagerly snap pictures and send them flying through the internet to various social media websites for a couple of extra thumbs up? Clever Girls (read girls as ‘advertising bastards’).

I can’t be angry for being fooled when it’s a stroke of genius by the creatives at hand. I haven’t seen Gio’s new ad, but I’ll be sure to seek it out one day when I can be bothered purely out of respect for tricking me into reposting their billboards. Now that I think about it properly, the website address and logo hadn’t been defaced in any of the ads, and I’m pretty sure that’s the first thing that most anti-advertising paint specialists go for. Oh to be you and naive again, and not have to ruin what could have been an enjoyable entry. Damn my mind, and damn the clever creatives.

Bugger. Turns out even the Youtube channel is covered in graffiti. My detective work certainly needs a bit of practise.

Don’t mind me. I’m just a gullible idiot.

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Suzuki – The Never Ending Test Drive

I watched TV today for the first time in about two months. I think I managed around twenty minutes or so before I popped Netflix on, but that’s twenty minutes more than most days! During that fateful time I saw an advert that actually had me grinning, sitting on the edge of my seat, and getting excited about showing it off to friends.

It’s rather bloody good isn’t it! Sure, it starts off quite slow but from about twenty seconds onwards, it’s pure advertising gold.

Obviously the premise is that the agent never gets driven back to the dealership, as the lovely gentleman test driving the car can’t ever be parted with it which is all well and good, but that’s not what drew me in. It was the attention to detail that impressed me so! The comedic set-ups were amusing and got funnier as the advert went on, but I think the pièce de résistance had to be the family portrait including the agent himself in the background. Genuine chuckles.

Now you need to picture the scene. I’m sat on my armchair getting visibly excited about how much I’m enjoying this advert, and all I could think about was the tag-line. It was going to literally punch me in the face with brilliance, and before you know it I’d be driving my own Suzuki Swift in a car-park very very slowly in small circles. Unfortunately, that didn’t happen. What actually happened was me throwing my arms up in disgust, screaming “What. What the fuck was that”, and then getting disappointed. How can such an interesting and witty advert be finished off with such a droll tagline. Someone shoot the bloody copywriter. He should be ashamed of himself. I don’t think the line could be any more bland if it tried. Sure it sort of fits with the strategy, but it doesn’t do what I wanted it to! It doesn’t grab you by the bollocks and scream “YES! WE KNEW WE HAD YOU ALREADY, BUT YOU REALLY NEED TO BUY THIS CAR!!”. In all honesty, it ruins what could have been a contender for ‘best advert of July 3rd’.

I am not going to sit here and tell you that I could have done better, but someone, somewhere in the world could have thought of a much better line than “Once you try it, you have to have it”. Why not just “You have to have it”?…. I’m pretty sure you’re already thinking of a better line now. Bah, it annoys me just thinking about it. Ruining a bloody good advert like that. Grumble grumble grumble.

Any way, let’s not distract from what should be heralded as a damn good execution. Well done Suzuki, and everyone involved from The Red Brick Road. Excuse my grumbling about your tagline, but when your art direction is that good, your copy has to be just as good, if not better. It’s your own fault really, if you think about it.

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Junior Copywriter Seeks Galaxy Defender For Out Of This World Fun

Yes, that’s the subject to an email I just sent in response to a placement vacancy at Love Creative. I don’t know if I should be finding myself hilarious, or throwing up with embarrassment. There’s a reason for the MIB references, and I’ll get straight on with it.

Do you want to be the Willard Smith of the advertising and design world?

Are you a recent creative graduate? Do you want to use your creative skills to solve business problems for brands like Johnnie Walker, PlayStation and Nike? If I offered you a two month paid placement with us at our Manchester studio, how much of my hand would you bite off?

If your answer is beyond my elbow, please send the following to

1. A short introduction explaining who you are, where you come from, what your favourite Willard Smith film is, and why.

2. A PDF portfolio that showcases big ideas, thoughtful strategy, craft skills, personal work, and evidence of a curious mind. (If it helps any, we’re not particularly interested in typefaces made out of twigs, letterhead and business card design, tea-making abilities, or flyers for your dad’s Depeche Mode tribute band.)

Unfortunately we won’t be able to reply to everyone. But if your work demonstrates that you’re the kind of creative that would flourish here – whether you’re a writer, designer, art director, developer, maker of things, competitive eating champion, or all of the above – we’ll be in touch.

There you have it. What an advertisement! Definitely something different, with a tone of voice I immediately fell in love with.

Basically, I didn’t want to send off any old job application. I wanted to stand out. I needed to stand out. I needed to be a little different.

That’s when it hit me! I’ve been mulling over the idea of lonely hearts columns in my head for a while now. I wanted to record some kind of viral video, akin to those amazing 80s dating montages available on Youtube, but I never had the time. Why not use the idea now? Why not send in an application in the style of a shitty, but incredibly self aware, lonely hearts ad?

I did.

Hello there.

I’m a 24 year old copywriter who graduated in 2009. I’m 5″10, and the wrong side of 13 stone. I have brown hair, brown eyes, and a hint of ginger in my rather substantial beard.

I like long walks on the beach, freshly cut grass, picnics, puppies, and I must say, I’m ever so fond of a good cliché. If I had to choose, my favourite Will Smith film would be Men In Black, as it still stands up as one of the most witty and entertaining Blockbusters released through out my childhood.

I, like everyone in life, is looking for that special someone. A person who will take me under their wing, shielding me from the harshness of the outside world, and spend their hours guiding me in the best possible direction to make sure I blossom into a wonderful and proud copywriter.

Could you be my Man/Woman in Black? If so, look to Orion’s Belt and you’ll know where to find me.

Again, I don’t know if I should be jumping for joy, or jumping off the balcony. I suppose only time will tell! I had nothing to lose, and everything to gain.

If I make someone laugh, smirk, or even crack the tiniest of smiles, at least that’s already put me at an advantage over a boring “I do this, I did this, hire me please” kind of response I imagine a few people will send in. However, with it being Love Creative, I imagine there are some absolute geniuses applying for the role, but even a “Well done, but not you” email will give me a pretty good sense of achievement. If I hear nothing back? I’ll never do anything this stupid again.

Well, until the next email I send which will begin “In West Cardiff central born and raised, on my personal computer is where I spent most of my days. Chilling out, maxing, relaxing all cool, shooting some n00bs on the Unreal Tournament map pool”

Someone. Please. Stop me.

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Face Books, and Insta Grams.

So everybody must know this by now, but Facebook decided to buy a little Spring present for itself in the shape of Instagram, for the measly ‘down-the-back-of-the-couch’ amount of $1bajilliontrillion dollars. I don’t know if it’s just me, but I really didn’t see that coming!


I have a love/hate relationship with Facebook, as I’m sure most of you do too;

On the one hand, it can be great for organising events, gigs, shows, flash-mobs, riots, MDKs, and, well, the whole shebang really! It’s a great way to be the vainest person you know, and host thousands upon thousands of images of yourself in the perfect pose, bottle in hand, head held high, smack bang in the middle of a pop-punk jump. You can connect with all those people that you’ve lost contact with throughout the years, and then judge yourself against them to see who has ‘won’ the game of life. And of course, lets not forget about all those hours you can whittle away playing Farmville!

On the other hand however, it’s awful for the fact that people invite you to all of their events, gigs, shows, flash-mobs, riots, and MDKs. Pictures of you bottle in hand, head held high, smack bang in the middle of a pop-punk jump are posted endlessly showcasing the fact that you can barely jump half a foot from the floor without become out of breath. You get to “add” all of those people that you’ve lost contact with throughout the years, like the school bullies who picked on you for having long hair, and took it out on your kidneys for being different. You end up stalking your old secondary school friends to find out that their jobs, houses, cars, and general lives are hundreds of times better than yours… And of course, lets not forget all of those valuable work hours you can whittle away playing Farmville.

Where am I going with this exactly? I don’t know, I’m whittling, but there’s a reason somewhere.

As much as I understand the love that Facebook receives, I’ve never been one to give it the attention it so desperately begs me for. I’ve always fallen close, but just as our social networking relationship began to blossom, a cuter, younger networking website whisked me away from the out stretched claws of Facebook. First it was Faceparty, then Facewhore, followed by a brief flirtation with Facebook only to be courted by Twitter, Reddit, WordPress, Blogger and 4chan.

Instagram, the darling of the hour, is a service I grew to love almost immediately.

It’s basically a photo app for smart phones, which adds ‘retro’ (and I say that very lightly) screen effects over all of the pictures of food you take. For a guy like me who eats loads of food, it’s a necessity in life. Not only could I make a picture of my breakfast look like it was taken on a 1950s Kodak camera, but I could then share it with whatever social networking website I so chose. I of course post it to Twitter, as it’s my SN of choice, but there was the option of adding it to Tumblr, Facebook or some otherstuff that I never did understand.

Instagram also became another social network in itself, with users requiring these name things that differentiated between users that I could only describe as “usernames”. It came with the ability to follow your favourite poster of food photos so you’d never miss a meal of theirs, and a handy ‘love’ button, to let your favourite poster know that you were totally mad jelly of their Yorkshire puddings. It was great. It’s still great. I hope it will always be great.


I think what I’m worried about most, is that Facebook might take that all away from me. They might integrate the app into their own website, and who’d blame them? If you have “30 million users uploading 5 million new pictures a day”, why not force them to do it through your own website? Webspace doesn’t pay for itself, so maybe sneaking in an advert before letting a user upload would be the way to go? What’s that? You want to upload this image to Twitter? That’s not Facebook.. don’t be silly Ciaran! You know you only want to upload it to Facebook. Facebook. FACEBOOK.

Yes I know, I’m jumping the proverbial gun, and Marky Mark Zuckers himself said that “Instagram would continue to work with rival social networks. That will allow users to post on other services, follow users outside of Facebook, and to opt out of sharing on Facebook.”, but who really trusts that guy? He killed Bill Murray.

Look at OMGPOP; one second they’ve created the global phenomenon DrawSomething, the next they’re being bought out by the bad guys at Zynga, and their CEO is posting ridiculously idiotic PR-destroying tweets calling out ex-employees for refusing to be part of the deal that cost Zynga a cool $200million. Anything can happen, and something, somewhere, at sometime, will.

What then world? What then? How will I know what Ashley’s had for tea? How will I know what Emily’s birthday cake looked like pre AND POST digestion? How on earth will I get to see the newest Burger Anarchy creation? How ever will I sleep at night?

Hungry, filterless and wanting.

For a more serious take on this subject, where tongues are not firmly pressed in cheeks, take a look at what Pete Davison’s written right here.

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Dogs; Advertisers Best Friends.

“Never work with animals or children.”

W.C Fields had a point, but I really don’t think the advertising world was listening. Next to people, dogs are more than likely the most used ‘prop’ to sell a product, not cows as I once thought! I’m pretty sure that whenever a creative takes an idea involving some form of animal to a CD, they end up leaving sour-faced and brutalised, but some where, at some time this week, a CD will okay an advert with a dog in it. Man’s best friend? Or should I say; A product’s best friend.

Take for example, this years Super Bowl. Two different products, two different approaches, two different ideas, but only one type of animal. Which one is your favourite?

It’s rather obvious to me which one is the better advert, but what did you all think? I bet you went with the one that doesn’t treat the dog as a glorified slave. The surprising difference between the two, is that somehow, Bud Light ‘Here We Go’ is supposed to be advertising not only their beer, but also the fact that you should rescue dogs. For starters, rescue dogs from where? The streets? Pounds? Your neighbours? The advert is quite clearly not backed by any reputable dog based charity, but in a short space of time, who’s going to care? Which genius creative thought that would be a good idea? How long are we going to have to wait until we see a newspaper article featuring a dog that choked to death on a beer bottle, trying to bring it to his master?!

Sorry, I went a bit Daily Mail there! Sure, it’s all in good heart and humour, but would the advert have run if the dog was replaced by an adopted child? Didn’t think so. Facetiousness aside, I just prefer the Doritos ad. It’s just… funnier. The final pay off is much better. What on earth is the final pay off to the Bud Light ad? A dog on a lilo? Hilarious. This Doritos dog done killed a cat, and is bribing some dude with a bag of CRISPS! I wonder if the gentleman in question would find a cats head in his bed if he told on the dog? Mind you, that thing’s fucking massive. I know I wouldn’t be dobbing him in crisps or no crisps.

Any way, I’m sure it won’t be too long before the next dog based advert is shown to the masses, but I do hope it’s something better than Bud Light’s attempt. What upsets me most is that the general public voted Bud Light’s advert higher than it did Dorito’s. They’re a weird bunch aren’t they. I wonder if they’re the same people who complained about this ad because “the dog looked a little scared”.

Yeah, get him to bring me a beer and become my friend’s and my free waiter. That’ll cheer him up no end. Of course he’ll be fed…. if he doesn’t drop the bottle again.

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TaxACT – Pissing In The Wind

For every advert that makes me want to physically force people to watch it, there’s another advert that makes me want to rip out my brain and wash it with bleach.

Kid pisses in a pool as an analogy for being “totally free”, then his sister jumps in it. Somehow this sells a service.

My brain.. it doesn’t… it hurts to think. Oh god.. someone pass me the asprin.

I mean, what I don’t get. What I really don’t understand, is who actually leaves the pool to urinate any way? Doesn’t bear thinking about.


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M&Ms – Wiggle Wiggle Wiggle Wiggle Ad Infinitum

The general public; I don’t get them. Sometimes, I really don’t get them. They like weird things. They dislike weird things. They’re generally, as a rule, quite a weird bunch of people. Mind you, maybe I’m the weird one? Maybe the many years living on 4chan message boards, browsing Something Awful until the wee hours of the morn, and reliving fond (not fond) memories of browsing Steak and Cheese as a teenager have turned me strange. I wouldn’t be surprised if they had, but still, the general public.. weird man. So weird.

I like to think I have “good taste”. Well, not good taste per se, but I at least have a vague idea of when something is rubbs, and well, when it isn’t! Take films for example; Anything with Kiera Knightly in it? Automatically rubbs. Anything with Billy Murray in it? Automatically brilliant. How about music? Well, I’m just as good; The Blue Album by Weezer. One of the best albums ever written. Anything written by Weezer after the release of Pinkerton. Definitely not one of the best albums ever written. See, I’m four for four so far! I could continue, but I don’t want to blow your minds. So asides from me telling you lot how downright brilliant I actually am, does this blog post have a reason to exist? Yes. It does.

During the Super Bowl, a Youtube channel was holding a vote to see which advert was rated “best” in America (Don’t get me started on how good of an idea this is from an advertising point of view, as you’re literally getting people to watch your ads over and over and over, in a FIGHT to see which one is THE BEST), and some how, one of the highest voted ads, was this nonsense;

I don’t get it. I really don’t. Is it supposed to be funny? Am I supposed to laugh? Am I supposed to want to eat chocolate? I JUST DON’T UNDERSTAND.

The talking M&Ms have been the mascot for the brand since 1996, and I still never understood why. Surely having these two amazingly voiced hunks of chocolate would put people off wanting to eat them? It’s like Burger King using a talking cow to sell their new Super Meaty burger. A bit cannibalistic no?

Maybe it’s because I’m not used to seeing these talking M&Ms much on British television. Maybe I don’t relate to the talking balls of cocoa as much as an American audience does. It probably doesn’t help that I can only ever remember one M&M mascot led advert that I actually liked, and I’m pretty sure it ended in the Red one being eaten.


Has the popularity of these adverts really been lost on a short trip over the ocean? Am I just a grumpy bastard who hates all things fun? Am I too old to enjoy a talking M&M getting naked and wiggling his non-existent crotch in another’s face? I think it’s all of the above. All I know, is this just proves that I’m obviously not part of the “general public”, and for that I’m kind of grateful. They’re absolutely lording this shit up, and I have a feeling it might actually win “best ad” of the Super Bowl.

Here’s a hint public who aren’t general; It’s definitely definitely not the best one. It’s not even close, and it doesn’t have any sort of talking chocolate contained within.

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